It’s weird isn’t it, how death affects us.

We all deal with it in different ways, crying ourselves to sleep, or laughing at fond memories.

But what about when you didn’t even know the person who has now passed on?

Recently, my Facebook became filled with posts about a lad from my area, a friend of many of my old friends, saying that he had unfortunately took his own life.

I never knew him (other than him coming into the sandwich shop I work in the other day late at night). But yet this news saddened me, and really got me down, and I’ve been trying to work out why.

I didn’t know him, and many people die every minute, all around the world, people who like this person, I don’t know.

I think it’s because it’s suicide that it’s effects have been strongly felt by me, and the fact that many of my friends are saddened by this new hole in their lives.

Mental health, and the things that that contains like self-harm and suicide are topics close to me because I have experience in those areas, concerning both myself and other people that I know.

I’ve been in hospital rooms, holding the hand of one of my closest friends as she recovers from a night of drinking, pill crunching and self-harming. Numerous times. And nothing was ever really done for her. The problem is she didn’t want the help, and in the end, what are you supposed to do?

Her family friends couldn’t force her to accept help, and she would have acted out and it wouldn’t have helped anyway.

I just feel like there needs to be something done, it shouldn’t be a taboo subject, self-harm and suicide should be talked about openly, and honestly, and bluntly.

I have no issues telling people that I self-harm, most people would think “oh he just tells people for attention” when in fact that’s not the case, I tell people because I want to let people know that it happens. I want people to be aware that there are millions upon millions of people suffering and that they shouldn’t be afraid of this scary concept.

Whatever the reasons behind this persons decision to take his own life, I hope he thought it all through and it wasn’t a rash decision, and I hope he has found some peace for himself.

And more so, I hope his friends and family are coping and are well. In these times it’s best to stick together and share the fond memories, and don’t focus on the negatives. There will be a hole left, and it can’t be left to fester, it has to be filled with happy thoughts.

Sleep well.


3 thoughts on “R.I.P

  1. This is so true. It is really sad and upsetting when someone takes their own life. I wish there was more help out there. I think a lot of people are afraid to seek help because they feel self harm and suicide isn’t taken seriously enough.

    You’re right, it is better to focus on the positives of the person’s life after they are gone. Instead of the negatives, and realize they are, at last, in peace.

  2. Reblogged this on ander01 and commented:
    When my father died he was 74 and quite ill but nothing fazed his spirit, he knew he was going and felt relief that my mother and the rest of us would no longer have to tend to him. Dealing with his passing was a little strange in that he was the simplest man I knew, and had left us a legacy of family orientation that was indelibly imprinted on our minds. I had two sisters who were very supportive and their husbands all chipped in to help, we spent most of the time just basking in the many jovial and warm memories that he had left behind, and on how much we were gonna miss his witty sense of humor. My dad had a way of making the mundane appear funny; somehow he had this knack of finding the lighter side with consummate ease, and often would have us in stitches over the way he enacted. I still reflect on those fond memories from time to time and although four years has gone, it still sometimes seems like yesterday, laughing at these memories eases the fact that he is just gone, but we are also happy because he is in a better place for sure. Love you dad; always.

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