Here is Draft 2 of the DAWN synopsis, made quite a few changes and added in a subplot, hoping people think this is much improved! Let me know what you think about the changes and click here to find all the other articles documenting my process in getting to this stage.
One thing I’m not sure of is the ending, having trouble thinking of how to end it so if you could suggest anything I would be very appreciative.
Story wise this will be how it has to remain till December 10th because my deadline is drawing closer. By then I need to have a finalised treatment, a beat outline, character biographies a full scene by scene breakdown and the first 10 pages of the script. So soon I will have to start writing the Scene by Scene breakdown hence why not much plot can changed at the moment.
After 10th of December though I can start reworking the plot (and the Scene by Scene accordingly) as starting next January after the Christmas break I have to actually write the full script with all the dialogue etc, so if I can get the plot and structure down before then in January it will be just a case of writing the script and then editing it constantly till the dialogue and action etc are as tight as I can make them!
Thanks again and please find the PDF of the synopsis below!