30 Minute Script – Completed Draft 1

After working all morning I managed to complete my 30 minute script, originally called Doughton Drive, but now it is just an as of yet unnamed TV series, the first episode though is called Escape.

30 minutes roughly equates to 30 pages, and unfortunately I have 21, not including the title page, so obviously I need to go back and add some scenes and change some things up, but as it stands the story has been completely told for this episode.

Below is the draft, hope you all like it.

Untitled TV Series-Episode 1- Escape

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16 thoughts on “30 Minute Script – Completed Draft 1

  1. Hi, Daniel, thanks for reading my blog. I’m interested in reading your script and will make comments, if you’d like (or I can just shower glorious praise on it, your choice). I know how hard it is to attend school, work, and find time to write. I look forward to read more.

    1. Hi, thanks for reading, I’m always looking for constructive criticism, just praising it won’t help be grow as a writer, but I thank you for looking out for my feelings lol. Hit me.

        1. All of Sarah’s parts are in the past. The audience is meant to believe that she is rushing to Benji to get him even though he’s already been captured, but what actually happens is she gets there and just as she tells him they arrive, she hides in the secret room and then it flashes back to normal time as Isaac comes into the study (just as he did in the past, letting these two scenes mirror each other), then back in the present Sarah comes out of the study panel and helps Benji escape, he told her to stay there till he called.

  2. I think it’s amazing that you can write the script in the first place. I can do plays, but scripts are not easy. I’m still working on turning a book into a script. So, kudos for getting as far as you have. And good luck for getting your script up to thirty minutes. I’m going to click the link and read what you have thus far.

  3. Okay, I just read it. I can’t offer any constructive criticism as it’s not my field of expertise, but I liked it. I wanted to know what would happen next so I kept reading page to page. Love the way it ended and I would definitely tune in to a show to see how Benji handles the revelation at the end of this script.

  4. I have very limited experience with script writing, and that was only in a class I took once, but let me go back and read it again and I’ll let you know.

    1. Aha! I see what i did now. When you first introduced Sarah, you said she was the girl from the photograph earlier; so everything she did was autimatically later than the scenes with Benjy in my mind. But now that I know the reverse is true it makes a lot more sense. As I said I have limited experience with script writing, so I don’t know if there is a standard way to indicate a scene is in the past. I think it would come together well on camera, but I think by that point I was really just reading the narative and the directions had faided out. Perhaps if there was something indicating more clearly that we were back at a previous scene?

      1. I was once told that you should write the script as you would have it seen, therefore not giving away the broken narrative, but after writing this script and based on feedback I think you’re right, I need something indicating that Sarah’s scene’s are in the past. So I think I will implement this on the next redraft.

        Like you said, the descriptions do blur out eventually just focusing on dialogue, but on screen you would only have the dialogue, with the action going on in the background, the watcher not knowing that Sarah’s parts were in the past. But I think it as you said, that on screen it would work well, but on paper, not so much.

        Thanks for getting back to me and appreciate you taking the time out to read this and comment.

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